With over 600 million streams worldwide, collabs with the likes of Skrillex, Big Freedia, Marshmello, Party Favor, NITTI, Felix Cartala and Big Gigantic, and shows at Coachella, Electric Forest, Bonnaroo, EDC Mexico, Hangout, HARD and more, it sounds like singer, songwriter, musician, DJ and producer Elohim has the world at her feet.
But mental health issues have been a constant struggle for the rising star, one that she’s been open enough to document on social media and via her music, making her an inspiration to others around the world. As she dropped latest single ‘Can’t Remember Your Name’ the powers that be at I House U decided it was high time we found out more…
IHU: Congrats on ‘Can’t Remember Your Name’. The message is pretty clear but how did it feel for you to be so vulnerable?
E: Thank you! Writing has become very cathartic for me. Often feels like the more vulnerable I am, the more rewarding the song or experience of creating the song is. So it felt great it felt like exactly what I needed to write at that moment. I wrote the whole song from my bed.
IHU: As an artist, how much do you bare, and how much do you decide to keep back?
E: At this point I’d say I bare it all. I just posted a video of myself having a horrible panic attack on a hotel bathroom floor throwing up into a toilet on Instagram. So I’d say that is probably as bare as it gets. At the beginning of releasing music as Elohim I didn’t show my face, I didn’t use my speaking voice, I was very anonymous. As I’ve continued releasing music I have peeled back the layers piece by piece showing the audience (who have become my close friends) different sides of me.
IHU: What do you want people to get from this song in particular?
E: With this song and all other music I release I want the audience to feel whatever they need in that moment. One of the many beautiful aspects of music is that it is this emotional arsenal that we have on deck and can go to depending on what we are feeling or needing in that moment. Just last night I was driving home and wanted something emotional so I put on the waitress by Jarrad K.. instant tears. But then this morning I was driving to a writing session and felt a bit anxious so I put on Don Tolliver. When I am at home I listen to jazz records on vinyl… shit that wasn’t the question but basically, I want the listener to get what I go to music for… FEELINGS, comfort, a friend, a memory, a safe space.
IHU: How instrumental was your team in insisting you look after yourself properly – and put yourself first – and do you think that attitude comes on the tail end of artists like Avicii, Amy Winehouse etc, not having that same level of care?
E: My team was incredible at listening to me and validating me. Without a doubt, the music industry and its acceptance of mental health has completely changed since the topic of mental health is so much more prevalent in the world and unfortunately yes it took losing real incredible artists for people to wake up. My team has been through everything with me and has seen me go through some really high highs and some really low lows. They are now able to identify when it’s getting really serious and when it’s time to step back and get help.
IHU: What does self-care look like to you on a practical, daily level?
E: Practical daily life self-care is getting good sleep and EXERCISE!! Exercise has seriously helped me so much but it took working with a trainer and really pushing myself to have goals. Getting 10,000 steps at least five times a week. Taking my medication. Keeping my environment clean! Baths gosh I love taking baths. My heating pad on my shoulders. Eating! Giving myself grace and surrounding myself with loving people but knowing when I need to be alone.
IHU: It’s not that long since you were in the thick of anxiety and depression – do you feel like you’re out of the woods yet or do you still have a way to go?
E: I think part of this chapter of recovery has been realizing it will never be 100% smooth sailing… But hey life never is. Staying in consistent therapy is really important for me. That being said I feel like a different person than how I was a few months ago. It has been a lot of work but also a lot of slowing down and allowing myself to do that. My central nervous system was so shot so much of this time was just trying to get back to a place where I was comfortable doing everyday things.
IHU: Were your fans and outside elements of the industry supportive when you decided to cancel your tour, or do you feel we have work to do to support artists when they make decisions that are often extremely difficult to make?
E: I think people for the most part are incredibly supportive nowadays. There has been an immense shift in empathy towards mental health. There is still a lot of work to be done especially with accessibility to help but I think compared to even 6 years ago we’ve come a long way.
IHU: The eye artwork you use on the single and on the video visualiser – is that significant?
E: I absolutely love eyes. I mean they are the only window to the soul after all.. ? They amaze me. Any time I have a pen in hand I end up drawing eyes. The eye will continue to build and grow and evolve and turn into an entire world.
IHU: How are you approaching 2024 to make sure that you have a better year than 2023?
E: Lots of exercise! Grace to myself. Space to heal and enjoy life. Writing a ton of music. Figuring out what it is I truly love and finding the right path for me. Weekly therapy! Gratitude and working hard!
IHU: What advice would you give to others inside the entertainment industry, especially at the front end, who are having similar struggles? What ultimately helped you put yourself first?
E: My advice would be to make sure you absolutely love doing this before you decide to dedicate your life to it. Because it really does take dedicating your life to it. Putting yourself first is really difficult in this world but it is so important to take time and space for you to heal and take care of you to go outside to be in nature to follow your gut. I had no other choice than to put myself first because it had gotten so bad. I am really grateful I did. We can’t wait until it’s too late. Grateful to be here and grateful for the opportunity to talk to you. Thank you!
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